Poems about abandonment encapsulate the raw anguish of being left alone in a desolation characterized by solitude, alienation, and loneliness. While solitude may initially appear as a welcome respite, the weight of loneliness becomes unbearable over time.
These poems explore the diverse contexts in which abandonment unfolds, encompassing romantic relationships, familial dynamics, the ebb and flow of friendships, and societal isolation. The roots of such abandonment are varied, stemming from experiences like childhood neglect, parental separation or divorce, loss of loved ones, the scars left by traumatic relationships, etc.
From these varied contexts emerge abandonment issues – psychological hurdles born of past abandonment or the fear thereof. These poems capture the suffering, unrest, and anguish of this turbulent mental landscape impacting the present relationships and self-esteem of individuals as they deal with deep-seated fears of being rejected, left alone, or unloved.
While exploring these deep emotional wounds, the poems take readers on a dark emotional ride of fear, anxiety, restlessness, hopelessness, pain, loneliness, alienation, detachment, and despair.
‘The Little Boy Lost’ by William Blake is the story of a young child who while out searching for his father gets lost in the woods.
The emotion of abandonment is at the core of this poem. From the child's desperate calls to his father to the final image of being alone in the dark, wet night, the feeling of being deserted is palpable. Blake's shift from the child's voice to a detached narrative in the second stanza further emphasizes this sense of abandonment, leaving the reader with a profound feeling of isolation and desertion.
‘The Anactoria Poem’ is a widely read love poem in which Sappho uses the story of Helen of Troy to speak on the nature of beauty.
This poem is among the finest and most powerful renderings of the feeling of abandonment ever written, largely because it layers the example of Anactoria over the story of Helen of Troy. Sappho focuses on the negative consequences of being abandoned, centering the experience of the person left behind rather than the person who has elected to leave.
Some say thronging cavalry, some say foot soldiers,
others call a fleet the most beautiful of
sights the dark earth offers, but I say it's what-
‘La Belle Dame sans Merci’ by John Keats is an intriguing narrative that explores death, decay, and love with a supernatural aura.
The emotion of abandonment weighs heavily on the knight, leading to his gradual decline. The lady's sudden departure leaves him adrift, consumed by despair and loneliness. This emotional abandonment manifests physically as the knight's once-vibrant demeanor fades to a pallid hue. His anguish is immense as he withers both in body and spirit, unable to cope with the loss of the lady's presence. The poem captures the destructive impact of abandonment or lost love as it leads to the knight's deterioration and eventual spiritual demise.
‘Havisham’ by Carol Ann Duffy explores the psychological reality of Dickens’ Miss Havisham from a feminist perspective.
The poem depicts the speaker's emotional turmoil after her traumatic abandonment by her fiancé at the altar. It captures her intense anguish and ensuing rage, restlessness, desolation, hopelessness, and years of suffering decaying her mind and body. She couldn't process the traumatic abandonment and kept wearing the same dress with lingering desires of lovemaking with her fiancé, as if he'd return and erase this moment, while also longing for ruthless vengeance captured in the violent imagery, emphasizing the intensity of her chaotic emotions. While being consumed by these conflicting emotions, stuck in abandonment trauma and ensuing disturbed psyche, the speaker suffers from self-alienation, unable to recognize herself in the mirror.
Beloved sweetheart bastard. Not a day since then
I haven’t wished him dead. Prayed for it
so hard I’ve dark green pebbles for eyes,
ropes on the back of my hands I could strangle with.
Vernon Scannell’s ‘Hide and Seek’ delves into loneliness and abandonment through a narrative of a hide-and-seek game.
The emotion of abandonment subtly evokes the fear of being left behind or forgotten. As the protagonist hides in the shed's darkness, the anticipation of being found transforms into a haunting realization of abandonment and vulnerability. This portrayal resonates with readers, tapping into universal childhood anxieties about separation and rejection. By weaving together hiding, loneliness, and the search for connection, the poem delves into the psychological experience of withdrawal and isolation that can lead to abandonment and abandonment issues.
Call out. Call loud: ‘I’m ready! Come and find me!’
The sacks in the toolshed smell like the seaside.
They’ll never find you in this salty dark,
But be careful that your feet aren’t sticking out.
In ‘Lamium’ by Louise Glück, the speaker under maple trees reflects on emotional detachment and the search for self-reliance.
'Lamium' sires the emotion of abandonment through vivid imagery and introspective reflections. The speaker's description of living with a "cold heart" and existing in shadows under maple trees conveys a profound sense of solitude and alienation. The imagery of isolation and emotional detachment highlights the speaker's feeling of being abandoned or disconnected from others, evoking a poignant sense of loneliness and despair.
‘The Dead Knight’ by John Masefield is a timeless reflection on heroism and mortality.
This verse deeply resonates with the emotion of abandonment. The dead hero, denied the dignity of a burial, lies forgotten. The vetches, ivy, and nettle become silent witnesses to the knight's isolation, entwining around his remains. Nature's mournful moans and the absence of human acknowledgment amplify the sense of forsakenness. Masefield crafts a melancholic poem that evokes empathy for the abandoned warrior, illustrating the emotional landscape of solitude and neglect in the face of mortality.
In ‘The Frog Prince’ by Stevie Smith, the principal subject of contemplation is a frog and everything that is linked with enchantment, satisfaction, and transformation into the subject of true happiness.
By pegging the theme of abandonment to the speaker’s longing to get close to the maiden coupled with the desire to be transformed, the poem repurposes the persona’s feelings of isolation. The loneliness of not having someone or being an outcast as well as the desire for companionship and reunion proves the notion of solitude or being left alone. Such appeal of the speaker about the arrival of the royal girl states the theme of feeling deserted and seized with loneliness.
Thomas Hardy’s ‘Ah, Are You Digging on My Grave?’ is a darkly ironic ballad that explores death, the illusion of eternal remembrance.
Abandonment is featured in the poem, though mainly shown through the dead woman's circumstances rather than her explicit revelation. The progression of discoveries of how she no longer impacts the lives of those who knew her shows her abject state of being left behind. She feels emotionally abandoned as every bond she thought enduring has severed. While the term is never mentioned, the poem constructs a scenario that leaves no doubt of this sense of being forsaken.
‘Mariana’ by Alfred Lord Tennyson, drawing from a Shakespearean play, depicts the sorrow of a lonely woman abandoned by her lover.
This poem is rooted in Mariana's abandonment by her fiancé due to her lost dowry, as seen in 'Measure for Measure.' It presents the deep scars left by a traumatic romantic relationship. Mariana's deep suffering and pain are deftly represented by the poem's decaying physical environment, symbolizing her lifelessness. Thus, abandonment inflicts deep emotional wounds, pushing her into a spiral of dark emotions, including hopelessness, pain, loneliness, and despair, eventually leading to a severe depression wherein her own sorrow consumes her very being.
Stevie Smith’s ‘Not Waving but Drowning’ is a tragic account of a dead man whose cry for help is mistakenly regarded as a mere greeting.
After reading about the man’s condition, it seems that he is abandoned by society. People stopped regarding him as a member of “the group.” When he died, they did not even consider the situation he might have been in. They termed his death “a sad tragedy” and moved on.
Langston Hughes’ ‘I, Too, Sing America’ delves into the experience of a Black man navigating American society, emphasizing his equal claim to the American identity.
The metaphorical exclusion from “the table” reflects the emotional weight of abandonment. The speaker, ostracized as the “darker brother,” embodies the pain of being dismissed by one’s own “family.” Hughes conveys this subtly, but the focus shifts quickly to empowerment, diluting the intensity of abandonment’s emotional depth.
‘The Jewel Stairs’ Grievance’ by Li Bai captures the lovelorn yearning of a woman waiting for her lover late at night amidst scenic beauty.
Despite the discomfort of waiting outside late at night, the speaker persists for probably far longer than they should, eventually retiring to their room where they keep a lookout still. Yet, it's not an overwhelming sense of hope that Li Bai's imagery leaves you with. But rather this profound and resounding sense of abandonment that's experienced by the speaker.
The jewelled steps are already quite white with dew,
It is so late that the dew soaks my gauze stockings,
‘Vespers [Your voice is gone now; I hardly hear you]’ by Louise Glück takes issue with a reclusive god who uses their absence to manufacture humanity’s dependence.
One of the more powerful emotions expressed in Glück's poem is a sense of abandonment. The speaker opens with a dreary description of their life in the aftermath of god's silence, illustrating a shadowy void, which reoccurs throughout the poem. This imagery instills underscores the feeling that humanity can be apathetically tossed aside by the divine at any given moment.
‘Who Understands Me but Me’ by Jimmy Santiago Baca is about the poet’s prison experience, showing his hardships and isolation, but ultimately finding inner strength and self-discovery.
The speaker feels abandoned by society and deprived of basic needs like water, sunlight, and companionship. This sense of abandonment shows the harsh conditions of solitary confinement. It intensifies his isolation and forces him to look within for strength. This feeling of being left alone shapes his journey of self-discovery.
they have changed me, and I am not the same man,
they give me no shower, so I live with my smell,
they separate me from my brothers, so I live without brothers,
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